5 AM Thoughts in Chicago
Day 2 of my menstrual cycle, and I slept day 1 away. Allowing my body to rest and nest in the comfort of my bed sheets. Accompanied by an oversized body of natural spring water from Trader Joe's, chocolate donuts, and banana chips.
Aware of my stressors and triggers, I decided to put myself first by giving myself what I needed to remain calm, cool, and collected.
Being the young woman I am, it's not easy to walk in my shoes.
I have foresight; it’s a blessing, but not for the weak.
I gotta remain hardbody to keep my heart soft. I know society doesn’t consider me, care for me, and have no interest in protecting me. Especially those within capacity to me, because they’re more concerned with what I can do for them, and how I make them feel.
It’s up to me to accept the truth of reality, embrace it, and continue to move forward with my life.
I gotta gatekeep myself.
If I give everyone who desires me access and go off how they treated me, my self-esteem & confidence will be nonexistent. There'll be nothing left of me, not even for myself.
Constantly drilling affirmations in my head, and talking to God:
I am worthy
I am deserving
I am nurturing, giving, and kind, and I deserve to be held & treated as such.
I am more than enough.
Other people inadequacy & dishonesty is not a reflection of who I am, and what I deserve.